Silly Category Archives :: Consider This

Stupid is as Stupid Does

It is so pleasant to come across people more stupid than ourselves. We love them at once for being so.
— Jerome K. Jerome

Source: Garrison Keillor's Writer's Almanac for Friday, May 2, 2008

Pianodan's Meme

Instructions:
1. Grab the nearest book.
2. Open the book to page 67.
3. Find the ninth sentence.
4. Post the text of the next 3 sentences on your blog along with these instructions.
5. Don’t you dare dig for that "cool" or "intellectual" book in your closet! I know you were thinking about it! Just pick up whatever is closest.
—pianodan

Source: pianodan's blog, Gettin' up and doin' stuff and going back to bed entry, Meme of Aug. 10, 2006

My sentences!
Some people find them insulting. My advice is don't enable receipts for all messages unless you are required to for some reason. Have Outlook automatically return read and delivery receipts?
—Walter Glenn

Source: Outlook Pocket Guide: No–Fluff Help for Outlook Users by Walter Glenn O'Reilly & Associates, Inc. 2003 ISBN: 0-596-00444-3

Now, that's cool! :-)

Ready to Learn

Personally, I'm always ready to learn, although I do not always like being taught.
—Winston S. Churchill

Source: Think Exist key word Learn quotes.

Visual Learning

You can observe a lot just by watching.
—Yogi Berra

Source: quoted in Learn More Now: 10 Simple Steps to Learning Better, Smarter, and Faster by Marcia Conner
See also:
marciaconner.com
Ageless Learner: Curious for Life
Baseball Library's Yogi Berra

Fractions :-)

Question: Who invented fractions?
Answer: Henry the 1/8^th.
—Unknown student

Source: Teachers: Jokes, Quotes, and Anecdotes Daily calendar Friday, February 3, 2006 Andrews McMeel Publishing ISBN: 0-7407-5200-6

Sex and Love

Sex without love is an empty experience, but, as empty experiences go, it's one of the best.
—Woody Allen

Source: The Best Liberal Quotes Ever: Why the Left is Right by Wlliam Martin. Sourcebooks, Inc. 2004 ISBN: 1-4022-0309-8

A Poem For Computer Users Over 50

A computer was something on TV,
From a Science Fiction show of note,
A window was something you hated to clean,
And ram was the father of a goat.

Meg was the name of my girlfriend,
And gig was a job for the night,
Now they all mean different things,
And that really mega bytes.

An application was for employment,
A program was a TV show,
A cursor used profanity,
A keyboard was a piano.

Memory was something that you lost with age,
A CD was a bank account,
And if you had a 3-in. floppy,
You hoped nobody found out.

Compress was something you did to the garbage,
Not something you did to a file,
And if you unzipped anything in public,
You'd be in jail for a while.

Log on was adding wood to the fire,
Hard drive was a long trip on the road,
A mouse pad was where a mouse lived,
And a backup happened to your commode.

Cut you did with a pocket knife,
Paste you did with glue,
A web was a spider's home,
And a virus was the flu.

I guess I'll stick to my pad and paper,
And the memory in my head.
I hear nobody's been killed in a computer crash,
But when it happens they wish they were dead.
---Author Unknown- Contribution by

Source: An email forwarded by my Bride on Friday, Jan. 7, 2005. Poem attibuted From Bruce D. in Adelaide

Making Green

In preschool this week, they're doing color mixing---you know, the old "two drops of red and two drops of yellow, and you get orange"---all that cool stuff. Well, I was cleaning the toilet and put in that blue stuff to make it look good, and my four-year-old walked into the room and brightly said, "You know, Mom, if I pee in there, we can make green."
---Mary, Mahtomedi, Minnesota, from the book The Best of Bulletin Board by Daniel Kelly

Source: Teachers: Jokes, Quotes, and Anecdotes 2004 Calendar for August 13, 2004 published by Andrews McMeel Publishing

To Help Others

We are all here on earth to help others. What on earth the others are here for I don't know.
---W. H. Auden

Source: Practice Kindnes series window card by Compendium, Inc., Lynnwood, WA
See also: PoetryConnection.net's W. H. Auden biography and Selcted Poems

Pledge of Allegiance [First Grader Version]

[My first-grade son] was eager to boast ... of his new accomplishment: knowing the whole Pledge of Allegiance. He said it:
I pledge of allegiance to the flag of the United States of America, and to the repubic for which it stands---one nation under God, indivisable, with liberty and justuce for all. You may sit down
---from the book Warning! Cute Kid Stories Ahead! by Daniel Kelly

Source: Teachers Daily Calendar, entry for Monday, September 13, 2004

Cross the Road?

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
---- Because he didn't have any guts!

Source: Cheese String Riddle!

The Parsnip

The parsnip, children, I repeat
Is simply an anemic beet.
Some people call the parsnip edible;
Myself, I find this claim incredible.
---The Parsnip by Ogden Nash

When the Music Stops

The trouble with nude dancing is that not everything stops when the music does.
---Robert Helpman

Source: The Little Book of Humorous Quotations edited by Alison Bullivant 2004 Barnes & Noble Books ISBN 0-7607-3776-2

Maybe (Maybe Not)

Author Robert Fulghum's list of contradictory notions he holds:

Look before you leap
He who hesitates is lost.

Two heads are better than one.
If you want something done right, do it yourself.

Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
Better safe than sorry.

Out of sight, out of mind.
Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

You can't tell a book by its cover.
Clothes make the man.

Many hands make light work.
Too many cooks spoil the broth.

You can't teach an old dog new tricks.
It's never too late to learn.

Never sweat the small stuff.
God is in the details.

Trust me, I'm the teacher.
Question authority.

Source: Robert Fulghum's Maybe (Maybe Not): Second Thoughts from a Secret Life, Published by 1993 by Villard Books ISBN 0-697-41960-8

Deja Vu

This is like deja vu all over again.
---Yogi Berra

Source: Yogi Berra Quotes - The Quotation Page

Pigs and Teaching

Never try to teach a pig to sing....
it wastes your time and annoys the pig.
--Anonymous